Works

They have him in a cage
And little children run
To offer him well-meant bits of bun,
And very common people say, "My word!
Ain't he a 'orrible bird!"
And the smart, "How absurd!...

My dear Everybody, -
The other day I lunched at a place
Where there was a pretty lady.
During the course of the talk
The pretty lady said to me,
"You see, Everybody is out of town
At present."...

(On the Return of the "Ophir")

Most well-behaved little Prince, -
As the small boy
Who will one day be the Sovereign Lord
Of certain other small boys
In whom I am interested...

(Before his Retirement)

My dear Sir Michael Hicks-Beach, -
The devotion of one's life
To the service of the Muses
And the neglect of golden opportunities,
Is not without its compensations,...

(On its Centenary)

My dear Stock Exchange, -
I am given to understand
That to-day you are a hundred years old,
And that to-day therefore
You will celebrate...