Albeit wholly penniless, Prince Charming wasn't any less Conceited than a Croesus or a modern millionaire: Though often in necessity, No one would ever guess it. He...
A poet had a cat. There is nothing odd in that-- (I might make a little pun about the Mews!) But what is really more Remarkable, she wore A pair of pointed patent-leather shoes....
She has slid down the channels Of history's annals Disguised as the child of a king, But that is a glib And iniquitous fib, For she never was any such thing:...
A fisherman lived on the shore, (It's a habit that fishers affect,) And his life was a hideous bore: He had nothing to do but collect Continual harvests of seaweed and shells,...
Matilda Maud Mackenzie frankly hadn't any chin, Her hands were rough, her feet she turned invariably in; Her general form was German, By which I mean that you Her waist could not determine...
In days of old the King of Saxe Had singular opinions, For with a weighty battle-axe He brutalized his minions, And, when he'd nothing to employ His mind, he chose a village,...
Miss Guinevere Platt Was so beautiful that She couldn't remember the day When one of her swains Hadn't taken the pains To send her a mammoth bouquet. And the postman had found,...
The vainest girls in forty states Were Gwendolyn and Gladys Gates; They warbled, slightly off the air, Romantic German songs, And each of them upon her hair Employed the curling tongs,...
A worthy couple, man and wife, Dragged on a discontented life: The reason, I should state, That it was destitute of joys, Was that they had a dozen boys To feed and educate,...
Without the slightest basis For hypochondriasis A widow had forebodings which a cloud around her flung, And with expression cynical For half the day a clinical Thermometer she held beneath her tongue....
Of all the ill-fated Boys ever created Young Jack was the wretchedest lad: An emphatic, erratic, Dogmatic fanatic Was foisted upon him as dad! From the time he could walk,...
Most worthy of praise Were the virtuous ways Of Little Red Riding Hood's Ma, And no one was ever More cautious and clever Than Little Red Riding Hood's Pa. They never misled,...
Fortunatus, a fisherman Dane, Set out on a sudden for Spain, Because, runs the story, He'd met with a hoary Mysterious sorcerer chap, Who, trouble to save him, Most thoughtfully gave him...
Once on a time, long years ago (Just when I quite forget), Two maidens lived beside the Po, One blonde and one brunette. The blonde one's character was mild, From morning until night she smiled,...
In Germany there lived an earl Who had a charming niece: And never gave the timid girl A single moment's peace! Whatever low and menial task His fancy flitted through, He did not hesitate to ask...
A man of kind and noble mind Was H. Gustavus Hyde. 'Twould be amiss to add to this At present, for he died, In full possession of his senses, The day before my tale commences. ...
An excellent peasant, Of character pleasant, Once lived in a hut with his wife. He was cheerful and docile, But such an old fossil You wouldn't meet twice in your life....
A maiden from the Bosphorus, With eyes as bright as phosphorus, Once wed the wealthy bailiff Of the caliph Of Kelat. Though diligent and zealous, he Became a slave to jealousy....
His name was Aladdin. The clothes he was clad in Proclaimed him an Arab at sight, And he had for a chum An uncommonly rum Old afreet, six cubits in height. This person infernal,...
Though Philip the Second Of France was reckoned No coward, his breath came short When they told him a dragon As big as a wagon Was waiting below in the court!...