Works

There was an old person in black,
A Grasshopper jumped on his back;
When it chirped in his ear,
He was smitten with fear,
That helpless old person in black.

There was an old man of the Dargle
Who purchased six barrels of Gargle;
For he said, "I'll sit still,
And will roll them down hill,
For the fish in the depths of the Dargle."

There was an old person of Pinner,
As thin as a lath, if not thinner;
They dressed him in white,
And roll'd him up tight,
That elastic old person of Pinner.

There was an old person of China,
Whose daughters were Jiska and Dinah,
Amelia and Fluffy,
Olivia and Chuffy,
And all of them settled in China.

There was an old man in a Marsh,
Whose manners were futile and harsh;
He sate on a log,
And sang songs to a frog,
That instructive old man in a Marsh.

There was an old person of Brill,
Who purchased a shirt with a frill;
But they said, "Don't you wish,
You mayn't look like a fish,
You obsequious old person of Brill?"

There was an Old Man at a Junction,
Whose feelings were wrung with compunction
When they said, "The Train's gone!"
He exclaimed, "How forlorn!"
But remained on the rails of the Junction.

There was an old person of Wick,
Who said, "Tick-a-Tick, Tick-a-Tick;
Chickabee, Chickabaw."
And he said nothing more,
That laconic old person of Wick.

There was an old man at a Station,
Who made a promiscuous oration;
But they said, "Take some snuff! -
You have talk'd quite enough,
You afflicting old man at a Station!"

There was an old man of Three Bridges,
Whose mind was distracted by midges,
He sate on a wheel,
Eating underdone veal,
Which relieved that old man of Three Bridges.

There was an old man of Hong Kong,
Who never did anything wrong;
He lay on his back,
With his head in a sack,
That innocuous old man of Hong Kong.

There was a young person in green,
Who seldom was fit to be seen;
She wore a long shawl,
Over bonnet and all,
Which enveloped that person in green.

There was an old person of Fife,
Who was greatly disgusted with life;
They sang him a ballad,
And fed him on salad,
Which cured that old person of Fife.

There was an old man who screamed out
Whenever they knocked him about:
So they took off his boots,
And fed him with fruits,
And continued to knock him about.

There was a young lady in white,
Who looked out at the depths of the night;
But the birds of the air,
Filled her heart with despair,
And oppressed that young lady in white.

There was an old person of Slough,
Who danced at the end of a bough;
But they said, "If you sneeze,
You might damage the trees,
You imprudent old person of Slough."

There was an old person of Down,
Whose face was adorned with a frown;
When he opened the door,
For one minute or more,
He alarmed all the people of Down.

There was an old person of Minety,
Who purchased five hundred and ninety
Large apples and pears,
Which he threw unawares
At the heads of the people of Minety.

There was a young person in red,
Who carefully covered her head,
With a bonnet of leather,
And three lines of feather,
Besides some long ribands of red.

There was an old person of Hove,
Who frequented the depths of a grove;
Where he studied his books,
With the wrens and the rooks,
That tranquil old person of Hove.