There was an old person of Cannes, Who purchased three fowls and a fan; Those she placed on a stool, And to make them feel cool She constantly fanned them at Cannes.
There was an old person of Hyde, Who walked by the shore with his bride, Till a Crab who came near Fill'd their bosoms with fear, And they said, "Would we'd never left Hyde!"
There was an old person in gray, Whose feelings were tinged with dismay; She purchased two parrots, And fed them with carrots, Which pleased that old person in gray.
There was an old man of Dunrose; A parrot seized hold of his nose. When he grew melancholy, They said, "His name's Polly," Which soothed that old man of Dunrose.
There was an old man of Ancona, Who found a small dog with no owner, Which he took up and down All the streets of the town, That anxious old man of Ancona.
There was an old person of Sestri, Who sate himself down in the vestry; When they said, "You are wrong!" He merely said "Bong!" That repulsive old person of Sestri.
There was an old person of Blythe, Who cut up his meat with a scythe; When they said, "Well! I never!" He cried, "Scythes for ever!" That lively old person of Blythe.
There was a young person of Ayr, Whose head was remarkably square: On the top, in fine weather, She wore a gold feather; Which dazzled the people of Ayr.
There was an old person of Rimini, Who said, "Gracious! Goodness! O Gimini!" When they said, "Please be still!" She ran down a hill, And was never more heard of at Rimini.
There is a young lady, whose nose, Continually prospers and grows; When it grew out of sight, She exclaimed in a fright, "Oh! Farewell to the end of my nose!"
There was an old person of Ealing, Who was wholly devoid of good feeling; He drove a small gig, With three Owls and a Pig, Which distressed all the people of Ealing.
There was an old man of Thames Ditton, Who called out for something to sit on; But they brought him a hat, And said, "Sit upon that, You abruptious old man of Thames Ditton!"
There was a young person whose history Was always considered a mystery; She sate in a ditch, Although no one knew which, And composed a small treatise on history.
There was an old man of Toulouse Who purchased a new pair of shoes; When they asked, "Are they pleasant?" He said, "Not at present!" That turbid old man of Toulouse.
There was an old person of Rye, Who went up to town on a fly; But they said, "If you cough, You are safe to fall off! You abstemious old person of Rye!"
There was an old person of Crowle, Who lived in the nest of an owl; When they screamed in the nest, He screamed out with the rest, That depressing old person of Crowle.
There was an old Lady of Winchelsea, Who said, "If you needle or pin shall see On the floor of my room, Sweep it up with the broom!" That exhaustive old Lady of Winchelsea!